Once upon a time you couldn't move for gorillas in the movies and, thanks to the King Kong remake in 2005, the Asylum got on some of that sweet ape action. Ostensibly an adaptation of Arthur Conan Doyle's Lost World this horribly cheap jungle adventure features Bruce Boxleitner as the token actor you've heard of. How bad does the giant ape look? Listen along to find out.
S2E11 - Enter the Asylum - Titanic 2 (2010)
The sheer brass neck of making an unauthorised sequel to Titanic is in many ways the most impressive thing about this film. Is it possible to remake one of the greatest visual spectacles in modern cinema without access to vast quantities of money? Is it possible to do it without access to a boat? All these questions and more will be answered in this week’s episode.
S2E10 = Enter the Asylum - Battle for Pandora (2022)
If there’s one thing The Asylum loves it’s riffing on the work of James Cameron. Battle for Pandora, timed to coincide with the release of Avatar: The Way of Water in 2022 attempts to ride on the coattails of Cameron’s beautiful but boring science fiction epics. There’s no money for an actual epic so instead they follow a well-worn path in low budget science fiction. How well does it land? Listen along to find out.
S2E9 - Enter the Asylum - Android Cop (2014)
In 2014 there was arguably only one film less hotly anticipated than the remake of Robocop and that was the mockbuster of the remake of Robocop. Android Cop, The Asylum’s foray into the world of Robocop rip offs, a remarkable fecund genre of movie. It’s got a stacked cast by the standards of Asylum movies since it features both Michael Jai White and Charles S Dutton in key roles. But will the middling star power of the man who starred in Spawn be enough to save this movie? Listen along to find out.
S2E8 - Enter the Asylum - Battle Star Wars (2020)
The Star Wars franchise is one of the most beloved pieces of intellectual property in the world, despite Disney's best efforts to run it into the ground. Can the Asylum produce something worse than The Rise of Skywalker? Listen along to find out how space opera works when you can't afford either space or opera.
S2E7 - Enter the Asylum - Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus (2009)
In which HJDoom spends far too many words talking about The Asylum’s 2009 creature feature that does more or less what it says on the tin. There’s a shark. There’s an octopus. There’s no money. Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus stars Debbie Gibson, Lorenzo Lamar, Vic Chao, and Sean Lawlor. It was written and directed by Jack Perez under the pseudonym Ace Hannah.
S2E6 - Enter The Asylum - The Terminators (2009)
Who knew that you could avoid infringing the copyright of The Terminator by simply sticking a letter S on the end? The Asylum that’s who. This was far from their first rodeo and it’s an effort to cash in on Terminator Salvation a film that looks better in retrospect only because everything got much worse after that point. The Terminator takes the core premise of a robot uprising but adds a little of that low budget magic by relocating most of the action to a small town in the middle of nowhere. Is it any good? No. Obviously not but is it any good by the peculiar standards of Asylum movies? Listen along to find out.
S2E4 - Enter the Asylum - Snakes on a Train (2006)
Snakes on a Plane was arguably 2006’s biggest disappointment, a film that promised so much more than it was able to deliver despite the presence of noted charisma haver Samuel L Jackson. Fortunately all was not lost as The Asylum bravely decided to tackle the idea of reptiles on public transport with Snakes on a Train. It’s got no budget but can it manage to deliver some slithery thrills regardless? Listen along to find out what opinions HJDoom has on the matter.