• Shows
  • About
Menu

Haunted Phonograph

In your ears because reasons
  • Shows
  • About

S2E15 - Enter the Asylum - Dracula: The Original Living Vampire (2022)

September 4, 2025

It’s something of a double header this episode as I actually sat down and watched Morbius, the film that Dracula: The Original Living Vampire is mockbustering. Morbius, it may shock you to learn is not a good movie but there’s always the possibility that The Asylum will manage to turn out something even worse. Listen along to find out.

Popular Antiquarian RSS
In podcast Tags asylum, david michael latt, david ramawi, mockbuster, b movie, review, retro, nerd, horror, vampire, marvel, jared fucking leto, jared leto, matt smith, comics, bram stoker, dracula, francis ford coppolla, ryan woodcock, christine prouty, india davies, michael ironside, stuart packer, Maximillain Elfeldt
Comment

S2E14 - Enter the Asylum - Transmorphers (2007)

August 21, 2025

It’s possible there are worse film makers out there than Michael Bay and if there are they’ve almost certainly worked for The Asylum at some point. Transmorphers is their attempt to recreate the cinematic magic of Bay’s Transformers movie, an astonishing franchise that somehow manages to be much stupidity than the Saturday morning cartoon from the 80s. How well does it work? Listen along to find out.

Popular Antiquarian RSS
Tags the asylum, david ramawi, david michael latt, leigh scott, mockbuster, b movie, griff furst, amy weber, michael wolf, eliza swenson, sarah hall, shaley scott, transformers, retro, bad movies, humour, review, analysis, scifi, action, battle, post apocalyptic, cheap, low budget, terrible
Comment

S2E12 - Enter the Asylum - King of the Lost World (2005)

July 31, 2025

Once upon a time you couldn't move for gorillas in the movies and, thanks to the King Kong remake in 2005, the Asylum got on some of that sweet ape action. Ostensibly an adaptation of Arthur Conan Doyle's Lost World this horribly cheap jungle adventure features Bruce Boxleitner as the token actor you've heard of. How bad does the giant ape look? Listen along to find out.

Popular Antiquarian RSS
In podcast Tags king kong, peter jackson, mockbuster, the asylum, david michael latt, david ramawi, bruce boxleitner, jeff denton, rhett giles, sarah lieving, pikake gardens, adventure, gorilla, primate, kaiju, christina rosenberg, amanda ward, steve railsback, leigh scott, stuart gillard, scorpions, jungle, b movie, low budget, cheap, film, tv, movie, peril, pop culture, popular culture, 2005, retro, 2000s, humour, review, analysis, podcast
Comment

S2E4 - Enter the Asylum - Snakes on a Train (2006)

June 5, 2025

Snakes on a Plane was arguably 2006’s biggest disappointment, a film that promised so much more than it was able to deliver despite the presence of noted charisma haver Samuel L Jackson. Fortunately all was not lost as The Asylum bravely decided to tackle the idea of reptiles on public transport with Snakes on a Train. It’s got no budget but can it manage to deliver some slithery thrills regardless? Listen along to find out what opinions HJDoom has on the matter.

Popular Antiquarian RSS
In podcast Tags the asylum, mockbuster, hjdoom, hieronymous j doom, david michael latt, asylum, retro, weird, snakes, bruja, magic, public transport, immigration, horror, schlock, exploitation, cinema, film, movie, b movie, z movie, cheap, cash in, david ramawi, julia ruiz, alby castro, lola forsberg
Comment

S2E2 - Enter The Asylum: H. G. Wells' War of the Worlds (2005)

May 22, 2025

Episode 2 of our deep dive into The Asylum sees us tackle the company’s first and arguably most successful mockbuster, H.G. Wells’ War of the Worlds from 2005 which just so happened to come out at the same time as Spielberg’s riff on the classic novel. It’s obviously incredibly cheap but it does have H Thomas Howell in it. Will that help? Listen along to find out.

Popular Antiquarian RSS
In podcast Tags asylum, h g wells, war of the worlds, jeff wayne, c thomas howell, david michael latt, b movie, horror, science fiction, 2005, mockbuster, spielberg, tom cruise, cheap, knock off, aliens, invasion
Comment

Beg for help from the highly-qualified human-like forms of We Will Fix You. Now meaningfully anonymous!

Name
(If you like or want to hear it on the internet radio, we don't need it)
Only if you want us to email you back.
Thank you!

Powered by Squarespace