Our questioner is jammed really far too full of live young, and wonders what entertainment options are open in so precarious and fragile a state - a state that we, as fragile and largely immobile members of society, feel fully-equipped to address.
Read MoreEpisode 9: My Iron Lung
It's hard when you're in an iron lung and desperate for amusement, conversation, or base, vulgar, carnal relief. Thankfully our raw empathy and insight lets us put ourselves in your hospital booties to come up with some pretty compelling solutions. We Will Fix You.